Military Joke : 1
TO ALL LADIES!
MARRY AN ARMY VETERAN!
HE CAN COOK!
HE CAN MAKE A BED!
HE CAN SEW!
AND HE IS ALREADY USED TO TAKING ORDERS!
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Military Joke : 2
An old Soldier and a young Soldier were discussing the merits of PT.
“We usually did one period on Friday afternoon with the whole battalion, if at all” the veteran said.
“I guess you didn’t believe in PT in the old days” the young lad replied, “Yeah you might say that,” the vet winked, “With route marches, advance to contacts and digging defensive positions, PT was considered recreation.”
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Military Joke : 3
A military inventor suggested a super weapon that could produce as much destruction among enemy ranks as one hundred soldiers, armed to the teeth. But trials revealed that it took a thousand soldiers to operate it.
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Military Joke : 4
Once upon a time, an Army Major General was admitted to a Naval Hospital.
Not being very well informed on Army ranks, the General’s young nurse kept referring to him as “Major”.
Finally, in exasperation, the General said: “Look young lady. If a Rear Admiral were admitted to your ward you would not call him “Rear” would you? Then don’t call me “Major”!”
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Military Joke : 5
A very posh British surgeon at a field hospital looks down at bleeding
and moaning Australian ‘digger’:
Surgeon: “My God, man! Did you come in here to die?”
Aussie: “No, Sir, I came in here yesterday”
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Military Joke : 6
In the draft times in the USA a young man appeared at the draft board with a waste-paper basket on his head. The draft officer exclaimed, “What are you doing” wearing a waste-paper basket for a hat?”
“Listen, reporting for the draft is like throwing my head away. And if I wanna throw my head away it’s my business how.”
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Military Joke : 7
An Air Force brass hat called his engineer expert and told him: “I’ve just read a remarkable trick motorists use to confuse would-be witnesses to an accident.”
“What is it, sir?”
“Motorists paint their cars in different colors, each side. Then people give contradictory evidence.”
“So what, sir?”
“Don’t you see,” the general exclaimed, “what wonderful prospects it may have if applied to bomber aircraft. Enemy air observers will be absolutely confused.”
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Military Joke : 8
Once upon a time at liberation war some young girl ran away when they saw the Military Army arriving their village. An old lady also ran away with them.
After finding safe shelter they asked the old Lady, “Auntie, why you also ran away with us?”
The old lady replied, “You didn’t see there was an old Military also with them!!
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Military Joke : 9
1st soldier: “Pass me the chocolate pudding, would you?”
2nd soldier: “No way, Jose!”
1st soldier: “Why not?”
2nd soldier: “It’s against regulations to help another soldier to dessert!”
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Military Joke : 10
The first woman recruit in the Army reported for duty and was told that although her quarters would be in a separate building, she was to mess with the men.
It wasn't until four weeks later someone finally told her that meant to eat her meals with them.
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Military Joke : 11
Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the doctor, "Why do you want to join the Navy, son?"
"My father said it'd be a good idea, sir."
"Oh? And what does your father do?"
"He's in the Army, sir." |
